Grinning Your Way Through Life

First dates are always a challenge. You are always hoping for the best, but often what you get is the worst. Somewhere up there, God must be always laughing at the continual joke that he foisted on the human race. The first date. Why is it so tough to get through? One problem of course is the choice of venue. If the guy is not forthcoming in where you are going, or if you are not sure how classy the place is, it is tough to dress for. I mean you are always trying to look sexy, but sexy for one venue might look a bit trashy in another. Of course the biggest concern is not clothes at all. You are most likely preoccupied with the fact that you might not hit it off with the guy and the evening could play out forever. Most of the time you will have decided in about twenty minutes that this is not going to work out, but you feel obligated to spend the rest of the date making nice. Especially if the poor sod has really put himself out for you. Most of us have a lot of issues just walking out of a first date within the first few minutes. It as if you have not given them a chance. In the end, you stick it out hoping for the best. My problem is that I am non-confrontational, and so I just sit there and try to make polite conversation for the duration of my sentence. Usually, after a bad date, I just ignore them if they try to call. If they do not call me, I count my blessings while secretly fuming that he should have at least called so I could ignore him.

In any event, I have finally found a way to keep entertained when I am out on a bad date.

Even if you are out with a steady boyfriend, he might run into work associates and spend the evening talking shop, thus leaving you pretty much out of the conversation. More likely to happen, and even worse in my mind, is him running into his pals and talking about sports all night. I am not into sports. I mean when you look at athletes on screen, they have all this protective gear or baggy clothing on. I mean, there might be eye candy galore, but who can see it. And video games? Give me a break. Looking at a bunch of make believe characters hack away at each other is hardly fun.  To listen to the animated way that gamers talk you would think that there is nothing more important in the world, but to me it is like watching flies mating. I am sorry for segueing into that topic, but as you can see it is a sore point with me. A real date killer!

My issue is that polite has been hammered into me from the time I was crawling. It is in my bones. As a consequence, I just cannot walk out of a bad date. So I often sit there, watching the clock crawl as my date tries to make conversation,  hoping beyond hope that the evening will end. Have you ever wished to be struck down by a meteor on a date? I have.After all, if someone has bored me senseless, or even worse, ignored me all night, it is highly unlikely that I will make love to them. Of course that means that I will likely just go home and pleasure myself.

So while being bored to death one night, my mind got to wandering a bit as I made a mental note to make sure that I put fresh batteries in my little pleasure rod.  I was in a sex shop with a girl friend of mind a few days ago and we had giggled over a pair of vibrator panties. At the time we just laughed at how inferior they would be to a regular vibrator. But tonight a possible good use came to mind. The following day found me picking up a pair with a remote control attachment.

When I dressed for my next date, I put on my undulating unmentionables. As I thought, when we arrived at our local drinking establishment, my escort du jour ends up in a two hour discussion on the recent NFL draft or some such nonsense. After about 5 minutes, I gave my pulsating panties a try. It was amazing! Suddenly, I did not give a damn what they were talking about.  So I sat there the rest of the night with a dazed look on my face pretending to be engrossed in the game on the set over the bar. By the end of the evening, I had even learned to manipulate the controls so that I could orgasm right at the point of a goal, so everyone thought that I was really into the game.

It worked out so well that it has now become my standard date wear.  For those nights were I am not being bored or ignored, I simply change out my electronic panties for regular ones before heading back home with him. If for no other reason than to stop any strange looks as we take our clothes off.

A short time later, I was in our weekly sales meeting listening to our management team preaching to us about quarterly targets, last quarter results, and new sales quotas. Needless to say, they were raising them again so that they could look good to their bosses. I was fighting off sleep and getting a migraine headache. I have never understood the purpose of such meetings. I mean, how are they supposed to help us get more sales. They never talk techniques or tactics, they only put pressure on us! It would be a lot better if they put as much time into market research so they could build better products that consumers would want more.  Enough about that. I started to daydream, then sort of had a flashback to the previous Saturday night when my boyfriend and his pals ignored me most of the night. They were spewing similar nonsense, but I did not care because I had on my magic pants. All of a sudden the idea took full bloom in my head! I could handle boring stuff at work the same way I handled boring dates! So the next week, I tried it out.  Suddenly, I had a whole new perspective. And with my skill at manipulating them so well honed, I was able to time my orgasm to coincide with the end of the meeting. The boss gave me approving looks for my enthusiasm. And the best thing was that the panties were quiet enough that nobody could hear. Well, one thing led to another, and before long I had a drawer full of passion panties.  Everyone at work lately remarks how happy I always am now. They all assume of course that I have a new lover or something. But I will never tell!  So I sit there smugly. They cannot figure out the source of the turnaround. My new nickname at work is Cheshire Cat!

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